Memo 001: Meet the Assistant.

[prpl_assistant]

A. Action for 1337 Benny Road.

[The first thing Miss Pauling notes when she opens her eyes is how bright the bedroom is. She shuts her eyes tightly, having not yet readjusted to the light. However, when she opens them up again, she immediately notes something else.

The walls around her weren't coloured purple.

Confused, she reaches for her glasses at the bedside table, only to note that they weren't her usual optic wear either. They were just the wrong shape.]

That's strange, where are my glasses...?

[Her hands fumbled around for her familiar pair of spectacles, until she accidentally knocked over the lamp with a resounding smash.]

Ooops.

B. Phone

Hello? Is there anyone there? I...I think I've been kidnapped!

Comments

[haveaplan.livejournal.com]

(The Sniper's impressed.)

You use a 'and cannon loike that? Sure, I've got one. Th' gun cabinet's in th' living room. You want t' come take a look? Maybe something else moight catch your eye.

[prpl_assistant]

(Her smile widens slightly. No one other than her father had ever complimented her on her gun-wielding abilities before. In fact she'd often get scolded by her numerous aunts back home that such un-feminine behavior.)

Thank you very much Mr Mundy. The Colt isn't too difficult a revolver to use though, to be honest. I mean, it is a single action gun, so it's simple enough to just cock the hammer back and pull the trigger.

I'll definitely check it out though. Thanks again for your help.

(She heads over to the living room towards the designated cabinet. At the sight of all those firearms, she knew she was going to find it difficult to pick. However, she still went for the Colt; she did use one back home for any of the "other" duties that the Administrator had for her, so she was more comfortable with it. That was not to say though, that she was mighty tempted with the Smith & Wesson models that the Sniper had. Maybe he'll let her switch guns later? She picks up the Colt and opens the loading gate.)

How did you even get these guns? Does Mayfield have a place that sells them?

B

[withwinter.livejournal.com]

That's because you have. Welcome to town.

Re: B

[prpl_assistant]

Are you the one who kidnapped me?

(She keeps her voice carefully guarded, determined to find out first whether this was a friend or a foe that she was speaking to.

Or rather, an ally or an enemy.)

[withwinter.livejournal.com]

Don't get me wrong - this has nothing to do with me. [ Even though she had been willing to have a little one, she's unwilling to have the person believe that. ]

[prpl_assistant]

Were you also kidnapped then?

[withwinter.livejournal.com]

That's right. Everyone here has been kidnapped, whether they like it or not.

[prpl_assistant]

I see.

Do you know why they kidnapped us, Ms...?

[haveaplan.livejournal.com]

Glad I was a 'elp.

Boi them from th' gun store.

(The Sniper owns pretty much every variety of gun sold there--most of it's small arms, but there's the occasional shotgun and hand cannon.)

[withwinter.livejournal.com]

As far as I know, it's all to play a game of happy families. Do you not have your own group of unfamiliar people? [ For now, she's putting off giving her name. ]

[prpl_assistant]

There's a gun store in Mayfield? (She runs a finger over the cold steel of the revolver, before she pockets the firearm).

Interesting...

I think I might head out and explore the town, just to get my bearings. I should be back in time to make lunch though, so is there anything you'd particularly like?

[prpl_assistant]

I think I do. I've seen pictures of me with them, but I can honestly say that I've never had such relationships with them in my life. The children are especially strange. They seem to think that I'm their mother for real.

(She notes the lack of a name, but decides not to push, just in case she annoys the stranger on the other line away.)

[haveaplan.livejournal.com]

Yeah. They only sell t' blokes, though.

Sure. Cook wotever you loike. I've got work t'day, so I'll be at the school at (Address). Come in through the back way and I'll let you in.

[prpl_assistant]

I see...would you mind picking up a gun for me then, when I have the money for it? I'll get a job to pay for it, but I'm just going to need someone to do the buying for me.

(She writes down the address.) OK, I'll see you there then at 12, Mr.Mundy.

[haveaplan.livejournal.com]

You're welcome t' any 'f the guns I already 'ave, but if there's something else you'd loike, let me know and I'll see wot I can do.

(Nods.)

Alroight.

[getsciencedone.livejournal.com]

I'm on here, you might as well ask them.

[vitalizes.livejournal.com]

[Whoawhoawhoa she knows Scout's real name -- panicpanicpanic -- oh, wait. It's okay, it's just the Administrator's assistant. Crisis averted.]

Oh, ah, hey. Didn't know you were here. Course I don't even know where here even is. I'm guessin' since y'think you were kidnapped, dat we're not at work anymore, huh?

Shit. Is the Boss Lady here too? Pff, whatever. If she is, she is. I ain't worried.

So~ since we're here and not on work, ya interested in finally seein' me with my shirt off?

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

No way, I've in this hellhole the entire time! I wasn't even droned, even.

I dunno, cuz they want us to be. It's total bullcrap. They love stereotypes in this town. Like, I'm a "dad" wit' two kids 'n' a wife. And a lousy job.

B

[retardantflame.livejournal.com]

[Just on the phone, for nothing else to do. You can hear some funny things on here.

Anyway:] Ya've been kidnapped? What the fuck? Are you new here, or've you actually been kidnapped?

[knowsabout.livejournal.com]

I'm Mana, it's nice to meet you. I haven't been here very long my self but I've been told if you get turned in to a drone there's a chance that you got sent home. Other then that I don't think they've done any thing related to ransoming off people.

[prpl_assistant]

It's a pleasure to meet you, Miss Mana. My name is Miss Pauling.

A drone? What is that, and how do you become one?

[prpl_assistant]

Pardon me, but is this Ms.Webb I'm speaking to?

[prpl_assistant]

Alright. (She's glad the Miss GLaDOS doesn't sound as angry as before; she felt the hair on the back of her neck rise when things turned slightly nasty a few minutes before. It was almost like being with the Administrator again.)

What do you mean by people from all sorts of different worlds? You've told me there other AIs and non-humans here. Could I have more clarification please, Miss GLaDOS.

[prpl_assistant]

Something doesn't fit here then. It's not possible for you to have been absent for such a long period of time without anyone noticing. Were you cloned, Mr McCann?

That explains the pictures then. (She gives a wary look at one of them, apparently taken on her "wedding" day.)

[prpl_assistant]

I guess not.

I don't know if the Administrator is here or not, but I think she can take care of herself. (She sincerely doubts that anyone could kidnap the Administrator; people don't know it, but her employer is pretty good at protecting herself from harm.)

Mr Jones, do we REALLY need to have this conversation again? I think there are more pressing issues that we need to attend to. Like how we're going to get out.(She rolls her eyes, exasperated by the Scout's flirting.)